Nighttime Wanderings

This is my life

All through the night

I cannot put up a fight

Anymore

My story is old

And my choices were cold

Or were the result

Of being faced with that same cold

From everyone I ever knew

Exceptions

Perhaps there are a few

To this overall rule

Certainly that is the truth

I don’t need any proof

Everyone else

Can see it in my eyes

Right through my disguise

Which I don’t bother much with

Anymore

It’s all just for show

I often leave it at home

Most of the time

I don’t wanna play the game

I just want to go away

Away from here

Nearer to somewhere else

Clearer for my mind

Less smoky

For my spine

Fearlessly

I could hide in such

As such

Inhabiting

Such a place

Alas

No such place exists anymore

It was destroyed in a battle

For sure

I heard a long time ago

We humans don’t have much left

To go on

There are not any escapes

The tanks smashed our cars

There are no subterranean passageways

Which were all bunker-busted

By something called “GBU-28”

I read in an old atomics manual

That I happened to have lying around

While I was lying on the floor

I found it on the ground

I switched on a light……

….. That’s when I saw her face

From before the holocaust

How beautiful she was

Back then

Before radioactivity poisoning

Darkened and mutated

Her soul

But the face I saw

To be sure…

… was a wonderful hallucination

With no grounding in reality

And glorying all the while

In superfluity

In fakery

Pretend Quakery

Was her ideology

Yes

The very same

That made the bombs drop

Throughout the globe

Carrying on

With the neo-holocaust

Initiated

By the pharmaceutical industry

And the shallowness found on the tellie

The combinatory effects

Of which many complications arose

Which brainwashed my baby

And legitimized nukes

Being used against any country

By a pill-popping president

And a psychotic ex-girlfriend….

… Hoping to take man-made drugs

Of a legal variety

To forget

I have no such option

I glory in the present

And lose my mind there too

My aspirations are tied to its randomness

And whatever genius remains

In my brain after all this pain

As I lay me down to sleep

I pray to nothing my soul to keep

When I think about nuclear arms

My eyes moisten

When I think about her

My mind cloisters

In an Ivory Tower

I wander about

Rolling on the ground

Tossing in bed

Trying vainly

To get some Z’s